Test Results and a Change of Plans

As I've previously mentioned, I have been planning to begin the RVA with Amita this fall. My intention was to begin preschool and to get a feel for curricula options and the school system, and then move ahead to kindergarten when she turned 5. 

I spoke with the enrollment agent at the RVA and she asked a few questions about Amita's skill level and where she was at academically. I told her about a few of the things Amita had been doing, the agent recommended I give Amita a placement test to make sure the curriculum will match her current level. So Amita and I talked about what a test actually is and we prepared by working on the computer a little bit. There were two exams, one called the DORA (much to Amita's excitement) and once called the ADAM. One tested core reading and one tested math skills. They both took about 45 minutes and were given at home on our computer. They had little animated animals that would ask questions and talk to Amita, and she was really excited to see what they did for each question. I was able to stop and start the tests to get Amita's wiggles out and, of course, pause for a very important snack break. I controlled the mouse and clicked Amita's answers even when I knew she knew and answer and still picked the wrong one (that was very hard for me to do!). The tests are designed to progressively get easier or harder, depending on the student's answer, until they even out at a student's baseline level. Ridhwi took Ashima out of the house (she was very excited to spend one-on-one with daddy) and Amita and I went through the questions.

The next day the RVA called and Amita tested into first grade math and mid-kindergarten reading. After a lengthy discussion with the teachers at the school and a good friend who has a masters in early childhood gifted education about whether Amita was developmentally ready for this, we decided the best thing for her was to be challenged according to her abilities. So instead of starting preschool, we began kindergarten and first grade. I decided to do a whole year of kindergarten even though a lot of the early stuff is review so she feels great about doing the "new" school assignments and she will have a solid foundation for the following years. Luckily I had done some early research so I had an idea about what curriculum I wanted. I spoke with the agent, she ordered it, and we were off! I chose Calvert, a truly exceptional curriculum by all reports. Here is a bit about it:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Y6moTIOwqs

At this point we are 7 lessons into both math and core subjects. I am amazed at how complete it is. For instance, PE and life skills are included. We are working on tying our shoes, balancing, and hopping on one foot, among the core reading, writing, and math. There are many stories to be read, things to think about, and fun things to color and put together. Yesterday she took an online computer course taught by a "Wise Owl" and learned how to drag a mouse, double click, and select something. This is the only computer work she has done so far, everything else is paper and pencil.

Amita is absolutely thrilled to be learning new things and to be academically challenged. She wakes me up in the morning asking what we are going to be doing in school today and can't wait to put all of her papers together for her teacher to see. It takes her 2-3 hours to go through her work depending on the lesson and we just take our time. Most days we have finished everything in the morning, and sometimes we do a few minutes here and there over the course of a day. 

I am really liking the RVA so far. I like that I am not the teacher, but I am still teaching my child from home. I like that she is being challenged at her exact level, even if it means being in two grades at once (my whole reason for homeschooling). I like that I am not grading and "in charge" of her education, but rather a facilitator who helps her with her work. I like that the teachers there have always been prompt in answering any and all questions (even on holidays and weekends!), and they truly want Amita to succeed and enjoy the learning process.

Another great thing about the RVA is that it is free for us through our school district. Technically Amita is enrolled in public school. She has enrollment dates and can be active in classes at our local public school. If we decide to continue through high school, she will be able to be active in sports, dances, and graduate with a diploma, all while schooling at home and being met academically at her own level. 

Since we will be traveling the month of October, I am working ahead. We are loving it! Here is what came in the box for this year:

Manilla paper, construction paper, music break CD's, string, newsprint paper, regular paper, tracing paper, modeling clay, and magnetic strips.

Index cards, pipe cleaners, watercolors, a ruler, thumbtacks, and the core kindergarten books.

Lots of books to read and sight word books

More core books

First grade math textbooks, manipulatives, and punch out resources (colored shapes, money punch outs, a punch out clock, etc.)

Here is everything on my shelf, ready to go!

Ashima will continue to the activities I've been doing with her. Working when she can and when she is interested, and doing activities by theme. Developing a love and interest for reading and school. Counting and singing songs, and most importantly: playing. She is following a lot of what Amita is doing so I think it is really positive for her too.

Our Homeschool Life

We've been homeschooling now for six weeks and I have to say, I think this is the best decision we ever made. The kids are LOVING it much more than I thought they would and our weekly schedule is a thing of beauty. The flexibility we have is something that is, after such a crazy year, something for which I am extremely thankful. 

Let me go into some more detail about each child and myself. 

Amita is thriving on the routine we have set. Our schedule is as follows:

Monday, Wednesdays, and Fridays: 

Breakfast around 7:30/8

School: 9-11:30

Snack: 11:30-12

Nap: 12-2 for Ashima 12-1:00ish for Amita

Play/Errands/etc.: 2:30-5:30

Dinner: 5:30-6:30

Get ready for bed:6:30-7

Bedtime: 7

Tuesdays: Toddler Time from 10-10:30

Thursdays: Music class from 9:45-10:15

Tuesdays: 5-5:30 Dance

Sundays: Church 

Soon coming: swim lessons

As you can see, we have quite a few activities throughout the week  so the kids are getting quite a bit of socialization and interaction (you were worried, weren't you?!). For Amita, this is golden. She absolutely thrives on the schedule and knowing what comes next. At the beginning of each day we put our schedule on the fridge next to our homeschool room and talk about what we will be doing. 

This is just how her personality. She is a very type A person and our days goes MUCH better when I let me know what is happening. There is even schedule in our home school routine. I very much like the idea of coming together for tutoring, going apart to work on independent activities, coming together again, etc. It works well so I can have time with both kids, so that's what we do. 

The first thing we do is ring the school bell. It's a two dollar bell I ordered off the internet and took three weeks to come from China. The kids love to ring it, though, and I feel that it is a way to distinguish between play in the school room and learning time. 

We start instruction with circle time where I read 3-4 books. The last two have to do with the topic we are are learning about (I'm doing theme based learning) and the first two are books that the kids pick at the library that interest them - no matter what the subject. I think one of the most important things about learning at this age is to teach a love of reading. We sit in a corner of the room where they are facing only me (to limit distraction) and we talk about the cover of the book and make inferences as to what it might be about. Throughout the book I talk about what is happening and have the kids guess what will happen next and ask them how they feel about what is happening. I stop on almost every page and ask them something. This helps keep their attention and helps with higher order thinking questions. For Amita I might ask her what she thinks will happen next and why she thinks that, for Ashima I might ask her to point to the ball and tell me what color it is. Circle time is also the time that I introduce any new topics (while I have their attention) and we do our daily board. 

This is our daily board where we talk about the weather, days of the week, and days of the month

Our Circle Time corner

After that, I get the kids up and going on some projects and we are off and running! I come and go from kid to kid throughout the rest of the time. 

Ashima likes school too, but I think she likes it more because her sister likes it that anything. I've been working on shapes, color, and letter recognition with her. Because she's still young, I let her come and go as she wants. I don't want to push her and make homeschooling something that is not fun. Besides, she still needs lots of free play. The one thing she sits through, is story time. She loves to have books read to her and identify what she is seeing! It's a joy to see. 

I am also really liking this schedule. At this point, it is extremely flexible. If something happens, I just try to make it up one afternoon or we just skip it. The kids are still pretty young so I feel comfortable with the flexibility.  The kids are also getting plenty of rest and have bellies full of healthy food, something they were not getting on our busy school mornings before. Sometimes I wish I could get a bit of a break here and there (especially to run errands) but honestly, the schedule is so much more relaxed than it was previously that I mostly just find myself thankful to not be running around like a chicken with my head cut off. Another thing we are really enjoying is the ability to schedule time around Ridhwi's schedule. If he is going to have a day off, we plan activities he can help with, and/or rearrange our schedule as necessary. There was also a day where the girls were not up for learning. They didn't get a good night's sleep and were cranky. No matter! That's what the movie Frozen is for, right? So instead we watched the movie, went down for an early nap, and did school after the nap. They were in a much better mood and much more receptive to what we were doing. 

It is amazing how much I have seen the girls blossom with homeschooling, in just a couple of months! They are happier, eating healthier (because we are not on the run so much), and are able to tell me so much about what we are learning. Amita asks for school daily. She loves to be challenged and loves the routine. Ashima likes to have the freedom to do some things and be able to play sometimes. It's really been the best decision for our family and we are reaping the benefits.

Amita will turn 4 in May and I have made a decision for her 4-K education. For at least one year, we will be homeschooling through the Central Wisconsin RVA (Rural Virtual Academy). They use a curriculum called Little Lincoln for Pre-K and Calvert for Kindergarten (but have 15 others to choose from if we don't like it). Because of our zip code and they way the RVA is set up, we will be paired with our local school for any and all activities they offer as well as any classes. Once Amita begins Kindergarten she will have the option of taking any classes through the school (art, PE, music, even math and science if I choose) and doing the rest of the sechooling at home. Calvert and the RVA is set up such that there is 160 or so lessons for an entire year - what would be a typical school year after you take out weekends, holidays, parent/teacher conferences, and summer break. As long as she completes the assignments within the year, the RVA does not care how and when I teach them. I have autonomy as to our schedule and she has the benefits of a traditional school. At this point it seems like the best of both worlds! I am excited and looking forward to it. This also works well for me because, as much as I like homeschooling, sometimes the burden of being the person completely in charge of their schooling terrifies me. This will give me the option of working with another teacher and giving Amita what she needs too. Amita will also have the option of working within different grades - for instance she could be in 6th grade science and 7th grade math. My two biggest reasons for choosing homeschooling was that I wanted the kids to be challenged academically no matter at what level they are (neither overwhelmed or underwhelmed) and because I wanted to have flexibility in their schedule for our family. Ideally, this would give us everything we are wanting. Hopefully it is as good in actuality as it is on paper. More updates when it happens. I was not expecting to do a a virtual school, but I am loving the way this one is set up, so this is what we are doing. 

All in all, we are happy. Our schedule is great, the kids are happy and learning, and things are even easier for me. After a year of wondering if this was the right decision or not, I am happy to definitively say that it was the best thing for us. Life has slowed down, in the best possible way. Each day my time is spend loving my children and showing them how to understand the world instead of driving them from one place to another. More than anything, I feel blessed to be able to raise them this way. 

The Big Plan

It's been a year now since I started the homeschool journey. I've gone through a mountain of research and strongly feel that this is the best decision for my family at this point in our lives. 

I've spent the last few weeks looking at all of the schooling options in our area and discovered an alternative academy that looks really awesome. If, at any point, the girls are feeling like they don't want to homeschool or we are feeling it is not working for our family, we are open to this option.

That being said, here is our preschool curriculum guide. I have a fairly loose plan (the kids are only 2 and 3) and plan to add and modify as needed until Kindergarten where I plan to purchase an all-in-one curriculum for at least the first year, and then evaluate after that. The beauty of homeschooling is that I can make sure that the kids are engaged and challenged at the same time and mix things up. Right now I have a loose monthly plan and as things come up I change if I need to. The kids are really excited - they love the learning activities we have done so far and are looking forward to doing more. I love seeing their quest for knowledge and the natural curiosity. It is such a fun way to learn!

Here is the plan.

I am following three books:

 Kitchen Table Play & Learn: Activities and Lessons for Building Your Preschooler's Vital Developmental Skills.

Preschooler's Busy Book: 365 Creative Games and Activities to Occupy 3-6 Year Olds

Mudpies to Magnets: A Preschool Science Curriculum

I've previously written a post about Mudpies to Magnets, but basically it has all sorts of different age appropriate science activities for preschoolers. 

The Kitchen Table Play and Learn book is the book I am going to follow most closely, while doing enrichment activities from the Busy Book. KTPL has 30 unit studies with 5-8 specific lessons contained within each unit. Unit Studies include All About Me, Dinosaurs, Rain Forest, Bugs, Winter Days, Garden, Summer, and much more.  Each lesson has a combination of language, math, physical abilities (fine and gross motor and hand-eye coordination), social skills, and a few other skills. 

I plan to pick a unit topic (e.g. fish, bugs, weather, flowers, etc.) and gather related books from the library and try to tie it in to any travel or activities in the area, and then do each lesson for as long as it takes us - guess a month or longer since I plan to only do lessons 2-3 times a week. I am going to supplement where possible and add activities from the Busy Book and Mudpies to Magnets. 

I also subscribed to the following: 

Koala Crate 

This is a box of craft activities that is mailed to your house each month. One of the things I struggle with most is thinking of crafts for the kids. I'm planning on doing a couple of months to see if I like it as much as I think I will, and am willing to do a year-long commitment if this is all it claims to be. 

Little Passports: Early Explorers

This is a box of activities, printables, and souvenirs mailed monthly that center around world themes like food, space, art, oceans, dinosaurs, and others. I again did a monthly trial to see if it is worth the money, but it sounds great in the description. I plan to try and tie unit studies from KTPL when I can. 

The Young Scientists Club

These are kits you can purchase for doing different science actives. I think that the activities will take several days to get out everything we can out of it. I chose the Clifford Magic Science Kit first. You can buy each kit individually, so I'll see if I like the first one and go from there. 

Academically, that is the plan. I think it is more than enough and I plan to do approximately one unit a month and go from there. I am going to try and have a lesson 2-3 times a week or so depending on how much we have going on.

In terms of learning environment, Ridhwi and I converted the formal dining room into a homeschool room. We are committed to seeing this for at least the next couple of years (possibly K-12 if we feel it will be good for the kids and family) and we felt the kids needed a place dedicated to learning and fun. 

I'm working on organizing it and putting up some pictures 

It is right off the kitchen, dining, and living rooms.

I've already unpacked these tubs and we are planning to make a window seat right here. I think I will spend a lot of time there myself too!

I also purchased a few wall pictures of colors and numbers for Ashima. I splurged and bought two of these educational easels for the kids. Quite a few activities in KTPL require a felt board and a white board. This is also a magnet board, perfect for letter magnets! I think that they will grow with the girls and they get older, too. 

Now to the question everyone (and I mean everyone) asks: what about socialization? I don't like this question. Never in my adult life have I been a room with 30 people of the same age. After high school, we are placed in situations with people of different ages and abilities and expected to learn and work with them, and this is how they will learn being home schooled.  Homeschooling is a much more authentic learning experience in several respects. I will not be locking my kids in a room and not letting them out. Even so, here are the different activities they will be participating in (with other kids so they can be "socialized"):

1. Toddler time/gym time at the YMCA. A 30 minute Physical Education class once a week with about 35 other kids.

2. Music and Movement at the YMCA. A music class with about 45 other kids.

3. Play dates. I have contacted several other homeschool parents with preschool children and we plan to get together and do actives/ let the kids play together. This is in addition to regular play dates with the children of our friends.

5. Dance class. Amita has been begging for a dance class. Our schedule was too busy when she was in school but now we have time for it.

6. Library activities. We are blessed to have tons of classes and activities for preschoolers at our local library. 
7. Swim Lessons. We live on the Wisconsin River so they need to learn to swim as soon as possible. They will be taking classes at the YMCA.

Once the kids are older there are homeschool co-ops with all sorts of actives, music lessons, sports, art classes, etc. for them to be involved it, hopefully not all at the same time. They will actually be able to do more social activities than if they were in school. Whew! So glad I dodged the socialization bullet. 

I have written about what I think I will struggle with already, but I think that getting the kids to understand that when we are doing school we are learning, engaged, listening, and following directions will be most difficult. I might be their teacher but I'm also their mom. Once we get into a routine, though, I think those things will work themselves out. I'm sure there will be frustrating days, but there will be awesome ones too. I'm excited about so much family time and have the ability to do such fun activities with the kids!

I am also going to read, read, and then read some more to the kids. I am going to allow them plenty of time to play, laugh, giggle, sleep, eat healthy meals, and be children. 

The MOST important thing I'm going to do, though, is instill a lifelong love of learning. This is really the root of what I want them to get out of homeschooling, and it begins now. I will not force them or make them do things they hate. There is no need. I will instead begin showing how fun and exciting learning can be. This is the most important I think they can learn. Once they love to learn, the world is their oyster.

This is it. My plan. I'm really excited to begin and I'll make sure to update as we go along regarding activities and things that work for us. 

Let's Do This

I have previously posted about how Amita was enrolled in a Montessori preschool. We really enjoyed the school and were happy with her being there while we were settling in our house. I am sorry to report that there was a teacher change in January and something that was positive became negative. 

Let me start off by saying that Ridhwi and I evaluated where we were regarding homeschooling over Christmas and decided that we were ready to take Amita out of school and begin seriously working on homeschooling after this academic year was over. We thought we would keep Amita in school until the end of the year so she could have some consistency. We had moved her around so much that we didn't want to change anything for her if we didn't have to. While we loved the school itself, there were things we didn't like but were willing to put up with them as long as Amita was happy and learning. 

Here were the things we did not like: 
1. The lack of sleep for both kids. I would have to get the kids up before they were ready in order to get them out the door on time. They were both sleepy and crabby throughout the day because of it. 
2. The lack of breakfast. Amita can easily take an hour to eat breakfast. As I mentioned in point number one, she was already getting up earlier than she was ready for so I couldn't get her up an hour earlier on top of that for breakfast. Because of this, she would eat her breakfast in the car during the 25 minute commute to school and she often went to school without eating anything because she was sleepy. They gave a snack within the first hour so I didn't worry too much about it, but I still was not happy about it.
3. The lack of freedom in our schedule. With Ridhwi's work schedule, it is imperative that we schedule family time when we can. It is especially important for the kids to get quality time with him since they don't see him at all on his working weeks. Amita's schooling limited our ability to do this quite a bit.
4. A crazy-insane schedule for a two and three year-old. We were running around driving Amita to school on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. We had Toddler Time at the YMCA on Tuesday mornings and Music and Movement class at the Y on Thursday mornings. On Saturdays we have been going to the library for the different learning activities they host. Every single morning we were out and running around. I hated that the kids did not have time for free play or adequate rest, and that I had to choose between school and some other learning experiences (especially for Ashima who was not in school).
5. Sickness. Amita was constantly sick this winter, much more than anyone else in the house. 

We were willing to work around these things so Amita could have some consistency, but then Amita's previous teacher (who was awesome) was moved to another classroom. The new teacher, "Ms. Smith", was not as effective of a teacher. The first day I took Amita in the classroom after Christmas Ms. Smith did not introduce herself to me. In fact, it was two days before I knew who she was (I thought she was a teacher helper) and a week before I knew her name (Amita told me). I feel it was a bad first impression - Ms. Smith should have introduced herself to the parents and maybe have written a letter about herself so we could get to know her a bit and begin a relationship - especially considering she came in the middle of the year. There were also some behavior problems and lack of proper supervision that began after Christmas. Ms. Smith was a first-year teacher. I myself have been a first year teacher and  I was willing to give her a couple of weeks to settle and get her classroom management figured out. There were eight 3 year-old kids in the class, after all, and I could understand that she needed to her to classroom flow down to a routine. Four times that Ridhwi or I went to get Amita from school she was in the hallway by herself. The classroom door was open, but still, this was unacceptable. A three year-old should not be unattended. Then the behavior problems started. There was a kid in the class, "James", who has been a behavior problem the whole year. Amita had told me several times about how James would get in trouble and be in time out, or about other things James had done that were just plain bad. She never did those things herself, she just told me about them. I wasn't too concerned because it was obvious the previous teacher had James under control. Then one day after the teacher change I was reading to Amita and asked if she could give me a kiss - and she spit on me. No joke. My sweet, loving, and kind daughter spit on me, and not in a silly way - it was deliberate and mean spirited. I immediately picked her up and was on en route to time out when Amita bit me. Hard. My kids have never bitten each other so I was surprised and incredibly upset.  After the drama was over, I sat her on my lap and we had a serious discussion about what was going on. I explained that what she did was very wrong and bad and how it hurt Mommy. I asked where she learned spitting and biting and she said point blank that she learned it from James at school. It became obvious to me that Ms. Smith did not have the class under control. When combined with the other things we did not like about the school situation in general and the fact that we were planning to discontinue school anyway, we decided that enough was enough.The next day I went to the front office and put in a two week notice for her last day. 

Let me also say this. If a daycare situation was our only option, I might have been willing to put up with these things and discuss the problems with the teacher and come up with a plan so they did not affect Amita or our home life. After all, she would have had a new teacher and class in August. I understand that teachers can only control so much in a classroom setting and that kids have to learn from difficult people throughout their lives but this is not our only option and Amita does not need to learn these lessons right now. We were already planning on pulling her from the school, this just helped us decide to move up the timeline. 

I've been planning my curricula for a while now and I am finally ready. I'm going to post the things I'm doing for both kids in detail in a further post. We are going to begin next week and I am really excited for this to happen. I've been planning and deciding for a year now, and we are ready to begin. 

Let's do this.

New Blog, New Year, and New Goals

I made a few changes to the blog! I hope you all like the new layout and title. I've been meaning to change it for a while and *gasp* the kids went to bed early tonight so I decided that tonight is the night! Believe it or not, when I began the blog I never intended for it to be published - it began an easy way for me to keep my research about homeschooling organized. Ridhwi was reading over my shoulder one day and thought I had some good stuff and suggested I publish it - so I did! I thought it would only be my family and possibly a few friends who were interested enough to read it so I have been amazed and humbled this year to have so many positive words of support and interest from over 3,000 people on 4 continents. I would like to take a minute to thank everyone who has mentioned how much they enjoy reading it. It is a huge source of encouragement and support to me.

I've been giving the future a lot of thought lately. For so long our family was in a holding pattern - waiting to see where we would go for residency, surviving residency, deciding where to move once we were finished, and moving. For the first time we are settled and I must say, it feels great. The kids are now two and three and can actually start to help with a few things and follow directions. The days when I feel overwhelmed are waning and my ability to do things with the kids is growing. Two nights ago, Ridhwi and I had a discussion about where we are on the homeschooling front and came up with a definitive plan - I will be writing about this soon. On the personal front, I have a few things I have been struggling with the last few years. Now that we are settled, I have decided there is no reason to put things off any further. This year I will turn 29 and, since it will be the last of my 20's, I have decided to make it count. This year, I will become who I've always wanted to be. I've written before about my struggles feeling "useful" as a stay-at-home mom and about missing my career. Deciding to homeschool the kids and writing this blog helps, but I still miss teaching. Keeping all of this in mind, I have made a few goals for the year. I don't want to use the word resolution because I understand that plans change and circumstances can change, but these are things that I want to work towards to feel good about myself. It might even take more than a year, and I'm okay with that.  

Here they are:

1. Follow my interests. When I began college I had an extremely difficult time deciding between music education and english education. In the end it was the fact I wanted a more traditional classroom that made the decision for me. Throughout high school and college I played clarinet in band. I really enjoy music but have not been able to do anything with it for years and it is something I deeply miss. I have decided that this year I will work on the goal of learning to play the piano. Since I already know how to read music, I think it shouldn't be too hard. The difficultly of accomplishing this goal is that we don't have a piano! I am hoping to at least get a keyboard. Maybe then I can teach the girls too - that would be something I would really enjoy.

2. Make friends. This is something I struggle with. I am not a naturally outgoing person and meeting new people is something that causes me anxiety (one of the reasons I love Ridhwi so much is because he is so outgoing he usually takes care of this for me).  However, he works a lot and I need friends and to do things outside of the home. This is it- this is where we are going to live and make our home and lives. It can be hard to meet people when you stay at home but I've already made several (and all on my own)! I'm hosting a girls' night in a few weeks and having my friends bring their friends so I'm hoping I can meet even more awesome people. I'm planning to attend a book club where I don't know anyone next week. I asked the librarian about it and she said that that mostly older women attend but that they would probably really appreciate me coming so I'm going to give it a try. Ridhwi's working so I booked a babysitter for a few hours and all I have to do is finish the book. It makes me anxious, but I'm hoping that since I'll be in a familiar discussion (I love talking about books) that this will help me break the ice a bit. 

3. Be healthier. Early last year I joined weight watchers and lost 25 pounds. With everything going on I have remained the same weight, but I am looking forward to getting back on the weight-loss boat. There have been times in my life where I have put on weight - times that were particularly stressful where I put on weight. My second pregnancy was also not very nice to my body. I do not have a specific goal weight in mind but I do have a specific pant size - the size I wore in high school. Part of feeling like I've lost myself over the last few years was feeling like I also lost my body - both from the weight gained and the changes from childbirth. I can't do anything about the damage from the pregnancies (hello stretch marks!) but I can do something about the weight, so I will. I am intending to do it realistically. I might still indulge a little bit if Ridhwi and I go out but overall I will count my points and watch my portion sizes. I don't care how long it takes me to lose the weight, I want to do it in a realistic and manageable way that will ensure I keep it off, which fad diets won't do. I know that this will make me feel good, and it will be great for the girls to see me making healthy choices and meals. 

4. Have healthy relationships. Since we don't live near family, I've learned the importance of relationships - good relationships. I've also learned who my true friends are (those that make as much of an effort as I do to continue a relationship). My goal this year is to foster healthy relationships with some friends and family. It's just not worth it when I find myself upset about something someone several states away is doing/saying. My life is here now, and I will make it a great one (see goal 2). This year I will be kind with everyone, but maybe not pursue certain relationships as I have in the past. It kind of makes me feel like a bad person, but I think it will make me happier in the end.

I'm hoping that I can begin my 30's not as a "new" me, but rather as my true self that shines on the inside and the outside. For the first time in years I am feeling confident in myself and where I am in my life. I am feeling I can manage more than just surviving the day with two small children, and I am excited about the future. 

Wherein I Realize I Can Do This

Amita has now been in preschool for several months and to this day I still remain undecided how I feel about it. I put her in school in the summer so she was mixed with two year-olds for the first several weeks - until three year-old enrollment went up enough to warrant separating the classes and and moving the three year-olds to their own classroom. At first I was very disheartened because I didn't feel she was learning much - just playing all the time. I stay at home so I really don't feel it is necessary to pay for a daycare (which was essentially what I was doing at that point). However, once she went to the other classroom I started to feel better. She came home with weekly lesson plans and I would get updates from her teacher - a lovely woman with the patience of a Saint - about how she was improving: drinking from a big girl cup, eating her lunch, and, about a week ago, she played with someone in the classroom (a big deal for her)! She also really school and her teacher. 

HOWEVER.

She has been in school for almost three months and has only been able to tell me one new thing she learned (the recognition of a bongo drum). Everything else the kids are doing are things Amita already knows. Also, by the end of the week, Amita is D.O.N.E. with school and life in general. She goes from 8-12:30 on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays, so she has to get up earlier than she is used to in order to eat breakfast and get ready. Then, by the time she gets home and calms down enough to sleep she barely gets a nap. I find myself spending all afternoon on Thursday and all day Friday trying to get her back on a schedule. Then, by the time she is a nice and wonderful child again, I have to start all over. I also have to wake Ashima up early to take Amita to school and she can be cranky throughout the day as well. 

My struggle is knowing where to draw the line between learning good social skills and learning academic material? Which is more important? Eventually, if I didn't put her in school, she would have learned these skills anyway, so what is she really gaining by being there?

I knew going into preschool that we were sending her essentially for social skills but I have to admit that I am rather disappointed by the lack of academic learning she has gained. I'm not expecting too much - I am simply expecting her to tell me anything that she doesn't already know. 

One day I was browsing on amazon and happened to see a butterfly kit for sale, where they send you caterpillars and you can follow them through their entire life cycle to chrysalides and finally butterflies. It was only $30.00 and I knew the girls would love it! Once I did that, I started looking at the library website online and came up with a lot of books and movies related to the butterfly life cycle. Then, I searched the internet, and came up with even more ideas! After that, my teacher brain took over and I started thinking up other lessons for different topics, including multi-media, art, nutrition, reading, and science. It was awesome! You can find the unit here. 

For the first time since I started this homeschooling journey I really felt as though I had it under control. I felt as though I could do it, for both kids, and I did! I am immensely proud of myself. Because the kids are still young and Amita is in school, I didn't push anything but rather fit in extra learning when we had the time - at most 20 minutes a day. 

I think for now we are going to have to find a balance between homeschool and preschool. We bought our house and have scheduled our move for the 6th of October and are trying to get some work done on the house before we move. In other words, things are crazy and honestly, it works well for me to have Amita in school so I only have one kid to take on house errands with me. We are doing enough at home that I am happy she will be learning new things academically.  While we are moving in our new home and getting settled I will keep Amita in school but I will most likely begin full-time preschool for 4-K. 

Another new development in my homeschool journey is that I attended a local homeschool moms gathering. It was very, very enlightening and made me feel much more confident about homeschooling to speak with other moms and find out how each person plans their day and what type of homeschooling they do (umbrella schools, online public school, unschooling, unit studies, online curricula, etc.). I have given it a lot of thought and really think they type of homeschooling I feel most comfortable with will include elective classes like art and music at a local school and the core classes like reading, science, and math schooled at home. I need to look more into the state laws regarding this, but, thanks to a great friend (that's you, Linda!) I have found a school that combines all of this with Calvert homeschool education. I finally feel I have found the right mix of home and school activities. I am still speaking with the representative and finding out more information, but so far I am liking what I am finding out.


So, this is where I am. I am barely keeping my head above water regarding the upcoming move, but I am feeling very confident about our schooling options going forward. We are going to leave Amita in school for now but are looking forward to starting a new preschool/K-12 curricula when I feel I am up to starting it - well after we are moved in and I am organized enough to begin.

This year has been a year of changes and everyone in the family is taking time to adjust. Things might be hectic right now, but they are a good kind of hectic. The kids are healthy and happy, my husband and I are in love, and we have a beautiful house we will soon be moving to. It is an exciting time in our lives and I am looking forward to our next (and final) move and being settled in our new home.

Big Changes: What I Learned From a 9 Year-Old

It is an established fact that Amita loves music. In Michigan, Amita took some music classes through Parents as Teachers and she absolutely loved them. She learned a lot and was always asking for more music time. Since then I have done some homeschool music lessons where we listen to music, clap to the beat, learn about rhythm, and dance with ribbons, which she also really enjoys. About a month before the move I happened to see a post about a music school in Stevens Point that was waving the admission fee as a promotion. I contacted them and asked if she was old enough for lessons and they said she was. I thought I was super mom. I had ideas of Amita being accepted to Julliard and listening to her play piano in front of a packed concert hall. I just knew she would love it. A few days before her lesson, I made a big deal about the and put her books in her backpack and talked about what a big girl she was and how much she was going to like her lessons - and she seemed really excited. 

I first sensed trouble when we arrived and she wouldn't even leave the toys in the waiting room to go in the lesson room. By the time I wrangled her into the room, things had gone from bad to worse. The teacher was a thin, wiry man with a soft demeanor and voice named Mr. Aaron. I'm sure he is a good teacher, but I'm not sure he is a good teacher for preschool lessons. Amita would not listen at all and instead ran from one place in the room to the other. She would not look at Mr. Aaron, talk to him, or interact at all. He tried not only playing the piano but singing songs with her and playing with rhythm sticks. By the end of the first lesson she was laying in the corner chewing on her bracelet with her feet in the air not listening to Mr. Aaron or me. It was a huge disaster of epic proportions. The most we could get her to do was push a key on the piano. Since I was so consumed with Amita, Ashima was more or less on her own and took the opportunity to run around like a little heathen and causing general havoc which did not help the situation. I was so disheartened. I was not expecting her to become Mozart overnight (okay, maybe I was), but I truly thought it would be something she would at least enjoy. I breathed a sigh of relief when Mr. Aaron quietly suggested we were at a good stopping point (umm… yeah, I'm pretty sure we are, Mr. Aaron) and got the kids out of there pronto. On the way home I tried to be positive and not fume, but I was upset with Amita for not listening. I wouldn't have cared if she didn't like the piano or the lessons, but she didn't even listen. Ridhwi had the next week off and I took him to the lessons. I kept Ashima outside in the waiting room and had him go in with Amita so he could assess the situation. He said the same thing I did - that Amita had no idea how to sit still and learn something new and either didn't know how to follow directions or didn't care to (my opinion is the latter- she'll do anything when there are M&Ms involved). I have no idea how to teach something like this and I am feeling sort of lost. I'm a secondary teacher, not elementary.  She did fine when I did preschool with her in Michigan, but I always tried to do things she was interested in. The conundrum we face is that Amita needs to have the discipline to learn things even if she doesn't like them. We were not talking specifically about piano - but what if she doesn't like reading or science? What then? I'm am not saying by any sense of the word that Amita needs to be able to sit for hours on end studying books. However, at her age, she should be able to sit or stand still for a few minutes at a time and follow directions or at the very least converse with someone other than Mommy and Daddy. Again, I wasn't upset that she didn't like the piano, I'm upset that she completely ignored Mr. Aaron. I also think that as well meaning as Mr. Aaron was, Amita could use a younger piano teacher or a Grandma who talks on her level and draws her in to the lesson a bit more. Mr. Aaron had great methods but a little bit more enthusiasm on his part might have helped Amita some. 


We have also noticed some behavior changes from Amita since the move. She has become defiant, has stopped listening and following directions, has been saying mean things. None of this behavior she exhibited in Michigan, so I can only assume that it is linked to the move. She has started holding grudges and saying, "No love Daddy, love Mommy", or "No love Momma love Grandma" or my personal favorite a few days ago, "No love Momma love Alli (the dog)." While I think to some extent this is normal because she feels unsettled, I don't like the behavior and nothing I am doing is making her stop. I also think that some of it is normal for a three year-old. However, when paired with the lack of following directions (unless I threaten, cajole, or bribe), and lack of listening (most of the time), I am at a loss as to what to do. She doesn't exhibit this behavior all the time and it seems to be getting a bit better, I truly don't know what to do other than repetitively putting her in time-out and taking away toys. I have tried positive reinforcement but it doesn't seem to make much of a difference either way at this point.  At first we just put up with it thinking it would  go away but it's not changing.  I know that her whole world and sense of order was changed by the move but it does not excuse this behavior and I don't want her to learn that it is okay. I've also gotten out my  Love and Logic book and tried to look for some answers, but it wasn't much help. 


I also noticed something when my 9 year-old niece Elizabeth came to visit for a few days - Amita would do what Elizabeth did and thought it was really cool. I am not sure if she did it because Elizabeth is older or if she was another girl or what, but she would do anything Elizabeth asked her. It was kind of frustrating to some extent but enlightening in other ways. Why would she not listen when I told her to get in the car but she would listen to Elizabeth? I also noticed that she did not communicate well with Elizabeth. It is not that she didn't know the words, it was that she wasn't using them, or was making unusual requests that made Elizabeth unhappy/embarrassed - like kissing her an unusually high amount and trying to look at her "big girl undies". While these things are normal in our household (we talk a lot about undies and we also give kisses to each other), it was obvious that Amita didn't know or chose not to follow the rules I've tried to teach her for when we are outside the house or for people that are not Mommy, Daddy, or Ashima. She also did not know how to play with Elizabeth in a normal way or to carry on any type of real conversation - even though she knew the words and knew what Elizabeth was saying. 



It is because of these lessons that we have decided to put Amita in a Catholic preschool a couple of days a week for a few hours each morning. Not for the learning aspect (although that is nice too), but specifically the social aspect. She needs to learn to follow directions and not expect anything in return. She needs to learn how to act in social settings, and she needs to learn what is appropriate and what is not. These are not things I can teach her at home without another group of kids. I've looked into the CoOps in the area, but most of them are for older kids - not preschool. It is my hope that this will help Amita and cause a detente of sorts between her and myself. We are planning on moving into our new home in October so this is a temporary solution to Amita's social problems and we are hoping that by the time we move I can continue her homeschooling in a manner that works better for both of us. When we toured the school, we discussed where Amita was academically and found out that she is already at the 4K level so I am assuming that she will not learn too much in terms of new material. However, I think that socially it will be invaluable, but difficult. 


In some ways I sort of feel that I will be throwing Amita to the wolves to teach her these social lessons. Several times in Amita's life the word Aspergers has been thrown around - including by her pediatricians. Whether she has it or not the fact remains that she is definitely a special kid with sensitive needs. If it were Ashima, I would have absolutely no worries about putting her in a highly social situation - but I also feel that in some ways Ashima has more social skills than Amita at this point. Amita is much more sensitive than her sister and tends to get overwhelmed and turns mean when she feels uncomfortable. I do not feel that this is a problem with homeschooling or lack of socialization on my part, rather I feel it is a personality trait with Amita and that she could benefit from some interaction for a few months. I am going to talk with the teacher before we go in but I am feeling unsettled about how she will react but understand how important and needed it is. At this point I am feeling like I don't have many more options. I need her to be around children her age and until she is older homeschool CoOps are not an option, at least not in the way Amita needs them. I am not intending for this to be permanent or for it to be her primary source of education. It is my intention that this will help her with her social skills. 

It has always been my idea that homeschooling would be in part a collaboration with public/private schools so the girls could have a chance to explore the arts with other kids and have social interaction - while having the bulk of their core academic work load be at home (you can see these posts here and here). It is my hope that this solution will help Amita with some social aspects of her learning that will also help her learn better at home. After all - the whole purpose of this journey is to give the girls the best education possible, even if that means that some of it will be out of my hands. 

As My Trial Period Comes to an End...

The time is coming where my three month trial with The Learning Box is up. I have decided not to renew for a while - we are going to be having family up for Ridhwis' graduation in June and then we're moving! I am also a little behind. As motivated as I was with my new organization system (which is working really well), I am still lagging a bit. I think I need to find a better time to do the activities because if I have anything going on during the afternoon homeschooling seems to get pushed back and then doesn't happen. 

I'm thinking I'm going to take the summer "off" and I have a couple of reasons for this. The first is that with homeschooling I'll be able to take lots of random breaks whenever I want. It also lines up with summer and since we'll be moving to WI we need to enjoy the outside and the warm weather when we can! Also, just because I'm choosing to stop using The Learning Box does not mean I can't teach: trips to the zoo and a trip to Niagara Falls are plans for the near future as well as practicing letters and shapes with sidewalk chalk, fine motor skills and speech with blowing bubbles, swimming, bicycle riding, long walks, time at the park, etc. There are TONS of summertime actives which promote learning and I look forward to exploring them. I'll be sure to post the things I feel work well! 

I think that when I go back to The Learning Box in the fall I'll be in a much better place to be successful - I'll have the option of help if I would like it, I'll have MANY more activities (YMCA, summer camp, dance, music lessons, etc.) the girls can be involved in, and I'll have a lot more room since we'll be in a house instead of an apartment. Maybe I can even having a corner/room for homeschooling, the prep time would be SO much easier because I wouldn't have to get it out and organized every time.  

We are coming upon some big changes in our family and our life and I look forward to experiencing all the goodness the next couple of months hold. 

Book Review: Home Learning Year by Year

I give this book at 9/10. It is available here. 

I originally rented the book from the library and ended up purchasing it from amazon. I found it incredibly helpful and informative. 

Let me start out by saying the only reason I didn't give it a 10/10 is because the copyright is 2000. The one I bought on amazon is 2009, so it is still out of date. However, the information is so informative I decided it didn't matter. 

The book is divided into 14 sections - preschool through 12th grade. Each section is subdivided into different subjects and corresponding resources for the subject. So, if you were interested in Preschool, you could find information about preschool, early childhood resources, magazines for parents, magazines for preschoolers, books for parents, books and resources from kids, and best reading lists. If you were interested in 6th grade mathematics, you could find information on what they should know in 6th grade, number theory, ratio and percent, fractions and decimals, operations, measurement, probability and statistics, geometry, and pre algebra. They also have non-core subjects like music, foreign language, health and physical education, and art covered. This book is an organized list of resources and age appropriate materials - a perfect resource for me.

One of my biggest questions about homeschooling was how I was going to know grade-level indicators. This book answers that question and gives me confidence and peace of mind that I will not be leaving anything out of my homeschooling curriculum.

This book is a keeper!

Side note: I think this book could be very informative for parents with children in school to make sure they are meeting all necessary milestones and learning goals. Additionally, I think it could be useful for teachers since it has some great resources and ideas. 

The Importance of Free Play

One of the reasons I like the idea of homeschooling so much is because children typically complete their lessons much faster and have more time for free play. Free play is an incredibly important aspect of development any many times overlooked in traditional school. The current statistics are that 40% of schools have now cut recess from their day. How is this best for children?

The social, physical, and cognitive benefits of free play have been proven time and again. In fact, Peter Gray, a psychologist at Boston College, suggests that play "helped early humans to overcome the innate tendencies toward aggression and dominance which would have made a cooperate society impossible." He goes on to say, "play and humor were not just means of adding fun to their lives. They were means of maintaining the band's existence - means of promoting actively the egalitarian attitude, intense sharing, and relative peacefulness for which hunter-gatherers are justly famous and upon which they depend for survival." 


Play also, "allows children to use their creativity while developing their imagination, dexterity, and physical, cognitive, and emotional strength," according to an AAP report. It allows children to explore the world, practice adult roles, and gain confidence. And it improves children's social skills as well, by helping them to learn how to work in groups, to share, to negotiate, to resolve conflicts, and to learn self-advocacy skills. 
According to Medical News Today, many parents are overloading their children with so many activities that childhood stress is at an all time high. While parents are trying to do good things and get their children involved, they can cause more harm than good. I'm not trying to compare myself to other parents or tell other parents what to do. I am also not telling parents that they should not have their child involved in activities. I am simply saying that I intend to give my kids plenty of time to free play in addition to everything else we do and there are many studies that have proven this to be a good idea. 
Bottom line: Homeschooling allows my kids to be kids. It allows them to have downtime, time to be themselves, time to play, laugh, and grow. Time to play outside, get dirty, chase butterflies, explore, and do all the things kids are supposed to do, while at the same time having a rigorous academic life. The balance between the two makes me one happy Momma. 

“The most effective education is to play amongst lovely things.” -Plato

Sources:
http://www.bc.edu/offices/pubaf/journalist/Gray_Play.html
http://pediatrics.aappublications.org/content/119/1/182.full
http://www.cam.ac.uk/research/discussion/school-starting-age-the-evidence
http://www.parents.com/fun/sports/exercise/the-importance-of-play/
http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/53699.php
http://pediatrics.about.com/od/activitiesforkids/a/1006_free_play.htm
http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2011/10/all-work-and-no-play-why-your-kids-are-more-anxious-depressed/246422/
http://www.theatlantic.com/education/archive/2014/06/how-finland-keeps-kids-focused/373544/


There are also about a bajillion more (okay, maybe a million). Just google the topic, you can spend hours reading research. 

The Mukerji Family List of Pros and Cons of Homeschooling

Pros:

• Completely personalized academically rigorous curriculum.
• Allows flexibility for how we want to structure our day.
• Allows for a lifestyle that would work for our family- mainly the ability to travel (especially to India) for longer periods of time and not just during the summertime when traditional school is out. We can make our own yearly schedule depending on what we have going on that year. 
• Not missing three months of schooling in the summer and forgetting material.
• Not as many standardized tests.
• I get my kids during the best times of the day. Instead of only getting them in the morning and evening (they tend to be tired and cranky), I get them when they are at their best!
• Great quality time with my kids.
• Assured safety. As much as I hate to say it, school shootings are on the rise. It hurts my heart. 
• Could have earlier college entrance if they are ready for it.
• GREAT flexibility of how you teach subject matter. I could still teach the concepts they need to know but do it through a subject they are interested in. 
• No wasted time. As a former public school teacher, I know first hand just how much time in a day is wasted, and it is not a little. 
• Fostering independence. Homeschooling by nature is a more independent way of learning. Especially when they would get in higher grades and I would be unable to help them with the subject matter.
• Would be able to take special classes like Latin or Bengali (my husband's language) and personal music and art lessons.
• Homeschooling is typically cheaper than private schools (our other option). This would allow us to save up a nice nest egg for their college educations/weddings. 
• No bullying or classroom disruptions from problem children.
• Homeschooling typically takes less time in the day to complete studies than traditional school. This means more time for free play, independent reading, and outings with Momma. 
• They have the ability to get experience in real life activities. Say, for instance, when Ashima is in high school she becomes interested in nursing. As a part of her studies I could have her shadow a nurse, or take a CPR class, etc. With more time in the day they could get more real world experience. That's not to say they couldn't have this in traditional school, it would just be much easier to incorporate into our day.

From Education Week:

"One study of more than 11,000 home-school students found that students typically score 34 to 39 percentile points higher than the average student on standardized tests. Another study found that 25 percent of home-schooled students were enrolled one or more grades above their age-level public and private school peers. These findings mirrored the study showing that home-educated students scored, on average, at or above the 84th percentile in all areas on standardized achievement tests."

http://www.edweek.org/ew/issues/home-schooling/ 

Cons:

• Traditional school forces children to study a wide range of subjects (not just those of interest - although whether or not this is better is another subject entirely) and people. With homeschooling, especially in Wisconsin, they might not meet a wide range of people or be exposed to diversity although they might not in traditional school either. This one is kind of up to chance.
• Let's face it, some days we just want to relax. Some days the kids could be awful. Some days I just won't feel like teaching the kids but will have to do it anyway.
• When the kids are crabby I am responsible for still keeping them on task and teaching them. The pro of this, however, is that I can modify a schedule for what they need: a snack, a nap, extra love and hugs, etc. That is not an option available with traditional education. 
• They might not want to homeschool.
• They might miss out on high school dances, activities etc.
• Reduced competition. Some times competition is good and encourages children to perform better.
• Time. This will probably take a lot of my time while I figure everything out and during their younger years. However, I would be spending my time teaching other people's kids if I'm not teaching my own.

There are also these pages with statistics:
http://www.home-school.com/news/homeschool-vs-public-school.php
http://www.hslda.org/docs/nche/000010/200410250.asp
http://www.homeschool-living.com/homeschooling-statistics.html


Through all my research, the plain fact is that homeschoolers excel academically, emotionally, and socially. They routinely out perform those in traditional schools.

I plan to add to this list the more I continue to research.


Sources:

http://sacramento.cbslocal.com/2013/04/17/just-the-facts-the-pros-cons-of-homeschooling/
http://www.homeschool-companion.com/pros-and-cons-of-homeschooling.html
http://www.homeschool-companion.com/benefits-to-homeschooling.html
http://www.middleschool.net/negative-homeschooling.htm
http://www.homeschoolheavenaustralia.com/home/?p=83
http://www.raisesmartkid.com/6-to-10-years-old/5-articles/50-benefits-of-homeschooling-how-it-could-make-kids-smarter
http://childrensmd.org/uncategorized/why-doctors-and-lawyers-homeschool-their-children-18-reasons-why-we-have-joined-americas-fastest-growing-educational-trend/